Grandma's House

Wow, they are serious about their segregation in Siesta Key, Florida. (j/k, don't sue me).

You Believe that Love is Devotion

When you think of love, you think of committing to one person for the rest of your life. In love, you see things as they are. You accept and love your partner's faults. If you are in love, you want the whole world to know it. You don't hold back with letting people know. You are patient in love. You are willing to wait for the right person and the right time.

Who knows what evil lurks in the hearts and minds of men? In Cincinnati, the Shadowhare knows. Bwahahahahaaaa!

I'm gonna dump all the political stuff I've got for ya into one entry, because if I think about it for too long I might lose my food, and I like food too much for that:

Here we have the AP (!) correcting the facts for Bambi. Gotta keep it real, dawg.

Bambi may be reluctantly refusing to delve into Bush Administration policies regarding interrogation techniques that some are laughingly calling torture, but AG Eric "You're all cowards" Holder is contemplating assisting Spain with an Inquisition. By what stretch of the imagination do they think we should allow another country to investigate our government, let alone charge a former President with any crimes?

I see Nancy "Bugeye" Pelosi is gloating over Specter switching parties, because now they'll have enough on their side there'll be no more need to explain themselves. She may not want to gloat too much, though; Specter voted against the 2010 budget.

For those of you who watched Bambi on TV tonight, I'm sorry. It wasn't my fault; I didn't vote for him. He was in Arnold, Missouri Wednesday morning shooting his mouth off about something. Between 200-300 tea party protestors showed up to let him know there is opposition out here. I thought that was pretty good for short notice on a weekday morning.

I guess he's starting to take notice. He felt the need to mock those who participated in the Tax Day protests:

“Those of you who are watching certain news channels on which I’m not very popular, and you see folks waving tea bags around, Obama said, “let me just remind them that I am happy to have a serious conversation about how we are going to cut our health care costs down over the long term, how we are going to stabilize Social Security.”

Does he think we weren't serious? Does he really think we don't want to fix these things? Does he think we want to be protesting rather than doing other things with our families? I truly don't think he's going to take any of us seriously until there is a protest in Washington, D.C. Someone needs to start planning one of those, if they haven't already. Could be I just haven't heard about it yet.

Enough of that. I don't want to have nightmares tonight.

Okay, so Arlen Specter is a Democrat now. Where's the news there? He's been voting with them for a long time. All he's done is weasel out of a primary fight next year, because he was afraid he'd lose. I sincerely hope the Dems put up a contender for the position to fight against him. He wouldn't be hard to beat. Schmuck!

Did you know horses can have mustaches? I didn't. Not until now. Alfie is the cutest guy, but I wonder about his stach. Blonde? Methinks someone has had a dye job here.

There's a new competition show on cable this summer. Prudence prevents me from putting the title of the show here, as some of my family is opposed to adult language. This show is a combination of a dance competition and a weight-loss competition. If you ask me, this is just the 50's. Thousands of teenagers stayed slim by dancing back then. You'd be surprised what doing the twist will do toward shrinking your waistline.

This poor little girl. I feel so sorry for her. South Korean scientists have developed a method that makes dogs glow under UV light. This news probably would have been great back when everyone had black lights in their homes for... eh.. um.. various reasons. They can make for great conversation starters. But to do that to a beagle? All the other beagles are gonna laugh at her. They're calling her Ruppy, for Ruby Puppy. These are the same scientists who cloned the dog they called Snuppy. Poor Babies.

Here ya go. Thanks to the good people at Pink Tentacle, we have some of the best sand artwork on the planet. Go check out the World Sand Sculpture Festival 2009.

A man in Plymouth, England was renovating his home. Going about his business, he started tearing out the walls of the bathroom, and lo and behold! What did he find? A 400 year old mummified cat. It was apparently put there to ward off witches. Frankly I think it was more of a case of the cat being a butthole and the family got fed up. For their sakes I hope the cat had used up all its lives in there.

I can't remember where I read it now, but recently I read Janeane Garofalo said, “The world would be better off with multiple superpowers. When the Soviet Union was a superpower, the world was better off.” So help me, I never EVER thought the day would come when I would agree with her, even a little bit. Maybe not the world, but the US was better off when the USSR was a superpower. Being the only one tends to relax you, making you more vulnerable to the little dipwads that like to attack women and children, or use them to blow people up. We're becoming lazy and careless when it comes to self-preservation, and that never would have happened 30 years ago.

I would just like to say THANK YOU! to Fox for deciding to broadcast "Lie to Me" instead of Bambi's "look at me I'm so great" press conference. I'd rather watch Lie to Me than have someone actually do it. I don't need to see his face every week on magazines, books, news, etc. If he would focus on doing the job y'all thought he was qualified for rather than looking for accolades, we might survive for a while longer.

WHAT THE FRAK!! This has got to be the most incomprehensible, irresponsible thing that has been done since 9/11 took place. Every single person involved in this travesty should be fired immediately, no exceptions! There is no reason for this to have happened at all. Any child with the most rudimentary Photoshop skills could have plastered Air Force One over a picture of the Statue of Liberty without scaring the crap out of thousands of people. I want to see heads roll, I kid you not. I haven't forgotten how I felt on that morning, and I don't even live in New York. I never want to forget the visceral feeling those images produce in me. Ever.

I started this pathetic excuse for a blog five years ago today. I can't believe I've stuck with it, because I'm really good at not finishing things. I guess when there is no "finish" to begin with, you can't get there. Or something like that.

I got this beautiful picture from desicomments.com . Isn't it nice? I found it when I did an image search for anniversary pictures. I hope they don't mind me using it. If they do, I'm sure someone will let me know.

This blog has changed a lot over the years, yet the basics are still shining through. I still love posting about strange news items, still adore doggies, and still complain about idiots in office. I promise those things will never change. And now I think I'll go eat some ice cream. Because I can.

Finally, here's a carbon offset program I can appreciate: Go Green With the Help of a Marine. Brilliant!!

It's not enough he's been on Time Magazine 13 times in the last year, or has been on talk shows and the Tonight Show. No, Bambi now wants to use another hour of prime time to bore us to sleep talking about his first 100 days. We just lived through it; we don't want to see it again. We don't need it explained to us. Believe it or not, Washington, we're not stupid.

I won't be watching. If I want a nap, I'll take one on my own. Unlike Lawrence Summers, Bambi's top economic advisor, I can keep my eyes open when I'm in a meeting. Anyway, I didn't enjoy the first 100 the first time, I don't want to relive it.

This week, Phideaux brings you the precious puppy. They can be so hard to resist:









That's it for Phriday Phideaux. Thanks again to ihasahotdog.com for nearly all the great photos we use for this segment. See ya next Phriday!

I have long been an admirer of Martin Luther King, Jr. He always impressed me as a man who truly wanted people to unite and work together no matter what color they were, and I've always tried to live that way. I've gotta admit, though, that his children are a real piece of work. This nation is building a monument to honor his works in the National Mall, where all the biggest monuments are, and these kids want to be paid for the privilege of using his likeness and his words. They want $800,000. I'm sorry, but that's ridiculous. Have they charged for every bridge, every building, every school, every street, etc., that has been named after him? I doubt it. I say, "No" to paying this money to them. They did nothing to earn it.

Have y'all seen this? I'm sure the liberals are watching it closely. From the reading I've been doing, I'd say we're in the middle right now. Not gonna guarantee how much longer that will last, though. People tend to get tired of being treated like they don't matter, like they are brain-damaged if they don't believe in Bambi, and don't like being accused of being a domestic terrorist just because they own guns and believe in God. More than a half million people showed up at the tea parties across this country, and that was on a weekday in the afternoon while a good many were working. I'm waiting for someone to organize one for the National Mall (all the best protests eventually make it there), to see how many turn out. I dare say it will be more difficult for the administration to pretend it didn't happen after that.

YEAH, BABY!!

Got a quick link dump for y'all, coz school started again today, and I've got a pile of work to do the first week:

If you're going to put up a sign, at least get the spelling right!

Now the limberness (is that a word?) of this guy is impressive, but...ouch!! That makes me cringe, and I'm a girl!

It's about time. Dan Brown has finally finished his sequel to The DaVinci Code and it is available for pre-order at Amazon, even though it won't be published until September. It's called The Lost Symbol, and if it is half as good as the rest of his novels, I'll be up all night reading it. I've read all of his novels, and he can really mess with your mind as you try to figure out the solution to the mystery. If you want, you can click on the link in the right-hand column and pre-order a copy for yourself.

I'll dump some more links later if I can. See ya!

This week's Phideaux gives us some examples of right-wing extremist, Bible-thumping, gun-clinging threats to society (yeah, right. Someone should introduce the DHS to real terrorists so they can tell us apart.)









Yeah, I won't go to a re-education camp, either. Seriously thinking of moving to Texas. I've never lived in another country before.

This chick could star in a remake of the Wasp Woman. I kid you not. If I ran into her, she'd scare me. And she did it on purpose, that's the part I don't understand.

You folks in the Springfield suburb of Willard need not worry about the Peeping Tom; it's just a Peeping Monkey. No problem. You can go about your business.

Talk about your Scrooge! Some jerk in Ohio has copyrighted the phrase "Shop with a Cop", which is the name of a program many communities around here run during the Christmas season. During that time, a police officer will be teamed up with an underprivileged child and they go shopping for Christmas. Well, that jerk now is demanding money if they use that phrase. In fact, he has also copyrighted many similar sounding phrases to extort money from these charitable activities. God forbid the kids get all the goodies. Jerk.

How weird would it be, if you were having chest pains, to go to a doctor and find out there's a pine tree growing in your chest? Yikes!

Ladies and gentlemen, this is the reason you should never judge a book by its cover. Class dismissed.

If you're going to be in the St. Louis area, why not stop in and see the Missouri Botanical Garden? They're celebrating 150 years of operation this year. With their children's garden, Japanese garden, butterfly house and much more, there's something for everyone. I've never been there myself, but I hear it is beautiful. I should go. I've lived in this state my entire life (shut up) and I've never been to St. Louis. But don't let that stop you. Go visit, and come back and tell me about it. Send pictures. I live vicariously through you people.

Attention, Wisconsin! If you're missing a large gorilla, try looking in Minnesota. They found one.

Thanks to the downturn in our economy, more and more cities are trying to find creative new ways (read sneaky new ways) to obtain funds. For example, being charged an "accident response fee" if you have a wreck and police or fire shows up; a monthly fee to cover the cost of streetlights; getting a ticket if your vehicle idles for more than one minute. This is on top of higher fees for hunting or fishing licenses, copies of birth certificates, dog licenses or parking. Keep an eye on your pockets folks, or you won't have anything left to put in them.

Final Score: Seals 3, Pirates 0

Hallelujah! Christ Arose!!

Well, somebody had way too much time on their hands, but I'll forgive them. You might, too, after you see the results. Frankly, I don't think the second one is a natural blonde, do you?

Let's call it Pizza-gate. Good southside Chicago boy Obama sends out for a pizza party...to St. Louis! Oh Noes!! Just out of curiosity, don't they have pizza in D.C.?

Quick update: I got a B- in Cost Accounting. I don't know how, but I'm not giving it back.

Here are a couple of articles you could file under law run amok:

The Preakness. Second leg of the Triple Crown of horseracing. Would it still be the Preakness if it were run anywhere but Pimlico? The lawmakers in Maryland don't think so. They are in the process of declaring eminent domain on the racetrack and grounds to keep the owner from selling it. Not cool.

The other story reminds me of my days as a teenager in Kansas City. The church our family attended would have suppers once a month or so. Anyone could call and order dinners, usually fried chicken dinners with mashed potatoes and gravy, green beans, corn, hot rolls, and dessert, and a church member would deliver it to their home. No proselytizing, just good deeds. Plus it was a good way to raise funds for things like carpeting for the sanctuary, etc. The teen group would occasionally do one of these dinners, usually tacos, to raise money for stuff like trips to the skating rink. If we'd had to deal with these idiots, we wouldn't have been able to accomplish as much. Bad law, folks. Change it quickly.

OOOH!! I'm so pretty!!

You Are a Snow Leopard

You have learned that you must rely on yourself, and yourself alone, to live a happy life. You are understand the world better than most people you know. You are very perceptive and intuitive. You need lots of space to think. If you don't get the space you need, you're likely to bite someone's head off. Because you are so thoughtful and solitary, people find you to be intense and mysterious. You're even seen as intimidating.

They didn't finish the game until one o'clock this morning, but the Springfield Cardinals won their season opener against the Frisco Rough Riders with a score of 16-4. Not a bad start, even if it was wet.

Now this is a story that warms the heart.

A cell phone used by a Wyoming 13-year-old to run up a nearly $5,000 phone bill will text no more thanks to her angry father and his hammer.

She was also grounded. How sweet it is!

I'm so glad the greeniacs have worked so hard to clean up the planet. They must be ecstatic to learn that Obama is actually thinking of polluting the atmosphere to keep temperatures down. Isn't that what we were doing in the first place -- polluting the atmosphere? Sheesh.

Are they serious? The morons working in the White House are claiming that Obama did not bow to the Saudi king. Everybody has seen the photo and/or the video of the incident. He wasn't bending over to shake hands, it wasn't a two-handed handshake (you can see his hand by his side), unless he has three hands. He didn't just incline his head in acknowledgement of a fellow leader. No, he BOWED DOWN -- from the waist -- to the head of a Muslim nation. Enough already! People are not that stupid. Well, most of them aren't.

Sunday is Easter, and it's Spring. We're expecting rain Sunday, but that's normal around here. We usually have some nasty weather around Easter, the last gasp of winter before the beauty takes over. Tonight, we had tornado warnings. As a matter of fact, they had a confirmed tornado on the ground a few miles from where my granddaughter is living now. I trust that God kept her safe, because there's no way I could contact her. Anyway, here's some Phideaux just for the spring season:









Aahh, Spring!

Can someone please explain this to me? Why, a mere week after more threats were made against our nation, a young male was able to steal an aircraft in Canada and fly it all the way to southern Missouri without being shot down? He should have never made it through a single state. He could have plowed that plane into dozens of different sites and killed a hundred people while we watched. Aren't there any adults in Washington?

Here's a quick quiz full of stuff you probably didn't want to know about me.

1. What color is your toothbrush? White
2. Name one person who made you smile today. Tim Conway
3. What were you doing at 8 am this morning? Getting ready to go to sleep.
5. What is your favorite candy bar? Sometimes Mounds, sometimes Three Musketeers
6. Have you ever been to a strip club? No.
7. What is the last thing you said aloud? “Gimmee kisses.” (to the dog)
8. What is your favorite ice cream? Chocolate
9. What was the last thing you had to drink? French vanilla cappucino.
10, Do you like your wallet? Never carry one. Don't use a purse, either.
11, What was the last thing you ate? Tuna salad sandwich
12, Have you bought any new clothing items this week? No.
13, The last sporting event you watched? NCAA Final Four Championship.
14. What is your favorite flavor of popcorn? Light caramel.
15. Who is the last person you sent a text message? I've never done that.
16. Ever go camping? Yes, but not for a long time.
17, Do you take vitamins daily? No.
18, Do you go to church every Sunday? I don't really go anywhere, but I used to attend regularly.
19, Do you have a tan? Not unless you can get one from a lamp.
20,Do you prefer Chinese food over pizza? That's a tough choice. I love both.
21, Do you drink your soda with a straw? No, and I don't use ice, either. Besides, bottles don't require straws.
22, What did your last text message say? See #15.
23, What are you doing tomorrow? Same thing I did today.
25, Look to your left, what do you see? A very fat beagle.
26, What color is your watch? I don’t wear a watch.
27, What do you think of when you hear Australia? Beautiful scenery (Hugh Jackman).
29, Do you go in at a fast food place or just hit the drive thru? Our local fast food places don't have drive thru service, so you have to go in.
30. What is your favorite number? 572
31. Who’s the last person you talked to on the phone? My pharmacist.
32. Any plans today? Nope.
33. How many states have you lived in? Two.
34. Biggest annoyance right now? I want to eat but I'm not hungry.
35, Last song listened to? Highway Star by Deep Purple.
36.Can you say the alphabet backwards? Can't everyone?
37. Do you have a maid service clean your house? Bwahahahaha!!
38. Favorite pair of shoes you wear all the time? Black slip-ons.
39. Are you jealous of anyone? Rachel Lucas, because she's in the UK and I'd love to go there sometime.
40. Is anyone jealous of you? I hope not.
41. Do you love anyone? Yes, I love a lot of people.
42. Do any of your friends have children? Yes, they do.
43. What do you usually do during the day? Sleep.
44, Do you hate anyone that you know right now? I don't hate anyone, but there are some that I don't like very much.
45. Do you use the word ‘hello’ daily? Only when I answer the telephone.
46. What color is your car? Light blue.
47. Do you like cats? Not as much as dogs.
48. Are you thinking about someone right now? No, I'm thinking about answering this question.
49, Have you ever been to Six Flags? No, the closest I've been is Worlds of Fun in KC.
50. How did you get your worst scar? Gall bladder and appendix removal, August 1984.

And for those who noticed, yes there were some numbers skipped, but I didn't even notice until now and I'm not going back to change them all. Accept it. I did.

Hurrah! A- in Criminal Justice. I aced my final paper. I am so happy right now. This will help offset the embarrassing grade I'm getting in Accounting.

Some more fun:

An 87 year old English woman and her husband were on their way to church, and her scooter kicked into overdrive, leaving him in the dust. They caught up to her five miles later.

Another case of 911 abuse. This time, a Texas woman called to complain that her rice dish didn't have enough shrimp.

A truck driver in California wrecked his semi, and said it was the burrito's fault.

Last, but definitely not least, the idiot who was elected back in November actually took twelve teleprompters with him. Aren't we being mocked enough around the world without this kind of crap?

Enough about him. I'm gonna go take my handful of meds and go to bed. See ya!

One more quick note before I stop for the day:

If you want to focus on your writing, try the soundtrack from Braveheart. I wrote half my paper on one run through. Best thing since classical for schoolwork.

For play, by far the GREATEST ROCK ALBUM EVER...sorry. The greatest rock album ever made is Machine Head by Deep Purple. What can I say? The worst song on the disc is Smoke On The Water, and that's only because I've heard it so many times. I don't understand why they always want to play the live version on the radio. The studio version is much better. If I had a CD player in my car, and this disc, I'd probably get a ticket at least once a week. Definite driving music. Woo! If you're more into folksy stuff, you can't be CSN&Y. Their harmonies touch the soul.

Later.

Created by Recipe Star

School is over!! I finished my last term paper at one o'clock this morning, but since school is in Arizona it was only 11 last night. Midnight deadline. Woohoo!!

Two Dogs, I should have asked you to help me with my Cost Accounting class. You probably know more about it than I ever will.

And now for some fun. The first one goes out to my younger sister (you know who you are) just because it cracked me up. They were having a problem with geese in Canada and decided to scare them off with a couple of cardboard coyotes. It didn't work out so well:

A jogger out for a run early one morning came across the coyote cutouts and was so startled she ran to a nearby construction site.

There, she told a worker a coyote had 'barked' at her and that she feared it would give chase, McCallum said.

The worker called 911 and Sarnia police were dispatched.

They arrived on the scene and quickly surrounded the coyote, only then discovering it was made of cardboard.

Bwahahaha!! They had it surrounded!! Oh, my sides!

Next, for my older sister (yeah, you) this story just because you really get my sense of humor. Somebody decided to blow up a statue of Lenin but that didn't work, either:

One of Russia's most famous statues of Vladimir Lenin has been bombed, leaving the Bolshevik revolutionary with a gaping hole in his rear.

I'm guessing it was a gas bomb.

And this one to my oldest sister (hey, sissy dawg) just because she has a chihuahua who probably needs to stay in shape to keep from getting stepped on. The UK has opened their very first pet gymnasium. Could be interesting:

Trained exercise co-ordinators will run a series of group exercise classes which will include Pooch Paunch Buster, Puuuroebics, Wag Attack, Canine Crunch and Pawlates.

Yep, could be interesting... to watch.

Now I need one for my brother, Uncle Turkey. For the man who has received some of the strangest gifts for Christmas from me that you can imagine, you won't be getting one of these. Although I think around here they would need to use a possum instead of a fox. ACK!!

That's it for now. School's out. I'm free for a couple of weeks. Daughter in town for one night because she has a custody thing tomorrow, so I'm not sleeping anyway until they get back from court. Gonna be a long morning. See ya!

Just a quick update on life here at Grandma's House. Blah. I'm still working on my final papers, got the outlines done and all the research. Now I've gotta actually write them. Criminal Justice won't be that hard but the paper for Cost Accounting...blech!

I'm so jealous of blog-queen Rachel Lucas. Not only are she and Mr. Rupert (NHRN) living in England for three years, just a hop, skip and jump from the places on this planet I'd most like to visit, they are going to a play starring Sir Ian McKellan and Patrick Stewart. On the same stage!! Peeps, this is huge! Captain Picard and Gandalf at the same time! Or, if you prefer, Professor Xavier and Magneto together again!! I'll go cry now.

As far as our so-called leader...an Ipod? Seriously? What's next? Gonna give the leader of China a Rubik's Cube? And what's the deal with bowing down to the king of Saudi Arabia? My President would never, EVER!! bow down to another head of state. And Michelle, for heaven's sake, I learned in grade school that when you meet the Queen of England, you're supposed to curtsy. Of course, when I went to grade school they also taught proper telephone etiquette, dining etiquette, etc. In second grade. This crap is really getting embarrassing.

That's it for now. I've got to work on these papers. Then out of school for two weeks before I start my Bachelor's Program. Woo hoo!!

As promised, here is this week's Phriday Phideaux. Our theme this week is... parents and children. Shall we?











Now wasn't that special? Thanks, as always, to ihasahotdog.com for their pics. See ya next Phriday!

Your results:


You are Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command)
Dependable and trustworthy.
You love your significant other and you are a tough cookie when in a conflict.

Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command)		90%
Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic)		85%
Wash (Ship Pilot)		70%
Dr. Simon Tam (Ship Medic)		65%
Malcolm Reynolds (Captain)		60%
Jayne Cobb (Mercenary)		50%
River (Stowaway)		40%
Derrial Book (Shepherd)		40%
Inara Serra (Companion)		30%
A Reaver (Cannibal)		20%
Alliance		20%

I'm gonna do a link dump here because it's finals week and I have two papers to write. I'll probably not post again until Phriday Phideaux, so enjoy these for now:

This global warming/climate change crap is really getting old: California legislators are actually considering banning black cars to cut down carbon emissions. Gimme a break.

It's not just here, though. The crazy has infected the entire world. In Australia, a group is advocating giving the inmates the keys to their prison cells, because the prisons will be safer that way. Okay.

And now, the lighter side of the news:

A Japanese company is trying to convince women to give up their thongs or other forms of undergarments, and wearing loincloths instead. No freakin' way, pal.

It seems squirrels in Kansas are going bald. While this may be slightly humorous, thinking about bald headed squirrels running around town, the part I found most amusing is that this was listed as "Breaking News".

A minor league baseball team in Michigan is planning to sell a monster burger at their home games this year. The burger is made of 5 beef patties, 5 slices of cheese, a cup of chili and salsa and corn chips on a bun. Now while that doesn't scream out "health food" to me, a vegan advocacy group is demanding they put a warning label on the burger. Really?

And last, but certainly not least, a couple of idiots have devised a life vest for polar bears to get them through the nightmare of global warming that is melting the poles. I just want someone to tape their attempts to put a life jacket on a polar bear. That would be a sight to behold.

See ya Phriday!