Day By Day© by Chris Muir.

Friday, March 27, 2009

Congratulations to Mizzou for making it to the Elite Eight! Did y'all see that amazing 3/4 court shot at halftime yesterday? WOW!! And now it's on to Saturday's game against UConn. They're ranked #1 in the West Region. I'm not skeered of dem. Put a tiger and a husky in a cage and see who comes out alive! GO MIZZOU!

This week on Phideaux, we're bringing the happy. This should get the weekend off to a good start:

Don't you feel better now? Then my job here is done. See ya next Phriday for more... Phriday Phideaux!

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Some people look at matches and glue and see... matches and glue. Others look at them and see Hogwarts, Minas Tirith, and aircraft carriers, among many other amazing creations. I'm not patient enough to do something like that.

How bad do you have to be at riding a bicycle when you can't even avoid a deer? When you take on a deer with a bike, the deer will always win!

Enough is too much already. Now a congresscritter has presented a bill which would make newspapers non-profit, just like NPR. Someone needs to tell Congress that newspapers are failing because they are crappy at what they do. Papers stopped publishing news a long time ago, and started publishing propaganda for the Democratic Party. If they were to return to reporting actual news and features people wanted to read, they wouldn't need a bailout.

Can you control when you need to pass gas? Not everyone can. There are some foods that can do a number on your intestines and, no matter how polite you want to be, that build-up is gonna come out. You can't always wait until you get to the bathroom.

Now, when you're confined to a moving vehicle and this happens to you, you can't just tell your body "NO!", but some bus drivers seem to think you should be able to:
An eighth-grader was suspended from riding the school bus for three days after being accused of passing gas.
He may have gotten the better punishment. A student at another school was arrested for farting in class.

Saturday, March 21, 2009

This is going to be quick, because I'm working on a paper due tomorrow on Homeland Security but I didn't want you to think I was ignoring you.

Did anyone see Dollhouse last night? I missed it coz I was watching the basketball tournament. Somebody let me know what happened.

A man down in southern Texas robbed a bank through the drive-thru window. Why would the teller give him the money? All he/she had to do was walk away and call the cops!

In order to provide us with an excellent definition of "overkill", scientists have developed a laser gun with which to kill mosquitoes. I've seen some large mosquitoes here in southern Missouri, but come on!

I thought this White House administration was to be the most transparent ever. The National Newspaper Publishers are giving Bambi an award as "Newsmaker of the Year", and the press are not invited.

While we are discussing the Bambi family, someone should really let them know a little about the child labor laws in this country. Mrs. Bambi has decided to put in a garden this year. Not too big, just 1,100 square feet! But Heaven forbid she do the work. No, they are having some fifth graders from a local elementary school come in and plant, tend and harvest the crops. The kids don't get the crops, though; the produce will be used for meals in the White House. C'mon, Mrs. Bambi, at least pay them sharecroppers wages!

Friday, March 20, 2009

This week, on a very special Phideaux... just kidding. It's a birddog, it's a plaindog, no it's Superphideaux!

Isn't that phun? Do you have a phavorite?

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Yeah, I really needed to see this story:
But new research shows that many well-known effects of ageing may start decades before our twilight years. According to scientists, our mental abilities begin to decline from the age of 27 after reaching a peak at 22.
At 22, I was juggling two very small children, so by the time I reached 27 they were both in school and I could feel my intellectual powers returning. Therefore, I feel I must conclude their research is stupid. Thank you.

Well we reached another milestone Saturday. We are, once again, a two-vehicle family. Sir Mugley bought himself the prettiest little Ford Ranger XLT, and it was actually built in this decade. It only has one little drawback: it's a manual transmission. Yes, I could probably drive it if I absolutely had no other choice, but we'd wind up having to replace the clutch so I'm sticking with our 91 Taurus. It's okay, because I don't drive that much anymore, and we needed a truck for moving. Now he has no excuse for carting some of our crap to a storage unit for safe-keeping until we get moved. He will be finishing his Master's Degree in May and we'll probably move soon after that. I'm really looking forward to it. You have no idea.

Saturday, March 14, 2009

What's the matter with this country? Have we forgotten that it's still illegal to cross the border without going through the proper channels? Our illustrious Justice Department is investigating an Arizona Sheriff for doing his job: arresting criminals. Wouldn't it be nice if the Federal Government would do it's part?

Speaking of prisoners, six Canadian "high risk" prisoners escaped from prison by cutting their way out with nail clippers. You can't make this stuff up.

Well this is pretty stupid.
It might make a larger omelette but a bigger egg isn't necessarily a better one — and it certainly doesn't make the hen that laid it very happy.

That is the view of the chairman of the British Free Range Producers' Association, who says that if you want to be kind to hens, you should eat medium, not large or very large, eggs.
How can eating smaller eggs keep chickens from laying larger ones? I've had chickens, and they lay some small, some medium and some large eggs. What are you supposed to do? Throw away the biggest ones? And what about double yolks? How do we ban those? Idiot.


1. It's outrageous!

2. There's no way a wounded soldier could go out and purchase medical insurance for a pre-existing condition.

3. It is a slap in the face of every man and woman who has sacrificed for this nation.

4. If they do this to the military personnel with "service-connected" injuries, what happens to those who are disabled due to "non-service-connected" injuries or illness?

A hardy congratulations goes out to our Missouri Tigers on their victory over Oklahoma State Friday night. They will be facing Baylor this afternoon in the Big 12 Championship Game.


Welcome to Phriday Phideaux's World of Animals! Yeah, I know it's technically Caturday, but I had homework. Anyway, let's start our journey:

First, we see the hopping style of the kangaroo phideaux:

Wasn't that amazing? Next, for our Islamic terrorist phriends, we have the undercover phideaux pig:

How lovely! And for cuddles, we have panda phideaux:

Awww! Look up now, because we've reached the giraffe phideaux:

Don't get scared now. We've reached the lion phideaux. Just stay calm:

And finally, we have the phideaux who does bear impressions:

Wasn't that fun? Wait till you see what I come up with for next week. We'll both be surprised!

Sunday, March 08, 2009

Poor Bambi. Isn't it just about his nap time?

They have finally found the culprit, the real cause of global warming: burping worms. Oh, brother.

It's the end of an era. The last Huey has retired.

Friday, March 06, 2009

This week, on a very special Phriday Phideaux:

Moments in the life of a phideaux. First, we have a wee babe:

Oh, so quickly we reach the tempermental youth:

As the phideaux ages, old tricks get harder and harder to do:

Finally, we reach the mature stage, at which time a phideaux can act rather immature:

That's a look at the life of a phideaux. See ya next week.

Thursday, March 05, 2009

Good for us! The Missouri legislature has spoken regarding the Guantanamo prisoners: Don't bring them here!

You gotta love the ingenuity of the kids in the fly-over states. A student at Mizzou has developed Pub Corn. It's popcorn that tastes like either beer, pina colada, or irish creme. It's a little pricey, but being non-alcoholic it should do well. I wouldn't mind trying the pina colada or the irish creme flavors. I never developed a liking for beer or wine, so I'd have to pass on that one. He's currently working on more flavors. If you want to check it out, here's his website. Let me know how it tastes if you do order some.

Obama's class shows no bounds.. I guess it's probably because he has none. Have you heard the latest about his treatment of Gordon Brown? After being presented with some lovely gifts from the British leader (Pen holder made from a timber from an anti-slavery ship, a framed copy of the commission of the HMS Resolute, and a first edition of the 7 volume Winston Churchill biography), the wonder occupying the White House presented Mr. Brown with 25 DVDs. Really?? Why not just give him the leftover fruitcake from Christmas?? I hope the movies were at least new.


Here's a little food for thought:
Among the many misdeeds of the British rule in India, history will look upon the act of depriving a whole nation of arms as the blackest.

Mahatma Gandhi

You Would Be an Upstanding Superhero

You are alert and observant. You can see through people easily. You know who's evil and who's good.

You need a lot of freedom in your life. You like to do your own thing, and you don't fit into any normal mold.

Through lots of life experience, you understand the world well. You can often predict what people will do before they even think of doing it.

You tend to feel apart from the rest of the world. You don't really fit in, and you don't try to!

You are a true intellectual. You are thirsty for knowledge, and you are curious about the world.

What Kind of Superhero Would You Be?

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Okay, I'm gonna dump all this political stuff into one blog entry, just to get it out of my pending stuff. I just couldn't let it go without spreading the word.

Anybody want to live in Detroit? Me neither. But that's probably why the average price for a house in Detroit right now is $7,500. That is the average price. Some of them are selling for a couple of hundred dollars or less. I say bulldoze the lot of them, and grow some food.

Obama is telling black Americans that times are going to be tougher for them. He made this statement at the State of the Black Union conference. Of course times are going to be tough. For all of us. Perhaps if one group wasn't singled out above all the rest we could all go through the tough times together. But that's not going to happen until this segregation stops.

Finally, and this should put a knot in your knickers, Obama has been nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize. Somebody tell me for what? He hasn't done a blasted thing to promote peace. Not one. Being half black isn't enough.

I was going to save this for Phriday Phideaux, but I can't wait: Behold I give you... Dog Who Sleep Runs Into Wall. I still giggle when I remember it, mainly because I know it couldn't have hurt him.

Seems I'm getting most of my news from England these days. Anyway, here's a fascinating story about a woman who lost both legs as a child. She contacted the special effects team that worked on Lord of the Rings, and they made her a mermaid tail. Now she can swim like everyone else. I started to type swim like a fish. I must be getting tired.

I remember, way back in the old days, one year at summer camp the director had made a scale model of the Old Testament tabernacle that I thought was pretty cool (you might remember it too Beda). Anyway, it wasn't nearly as detailed as this model of Herod's Temple, but it didn't take 30 years of his life, either. 30 years! And he still isn't finished. That's dedication.

Doesn't it seem ironic that after being declared a heretic, then vindicated by the Catholic Church, that the one body part belonging to Galileo on display in Italy would be his middle finger?

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