Day By Day© by Chris Muir.

Tuesday, January 31, 2006

I just received breaking news from MSNBC which stated that Coretta Scott King has passed away. I'm sure she's now rejoicing with Martin in Heaven. God bless her family in this time of loss.

I'm going to be updating my blogroll in the next day or two, so get ready for new goodness in your life. If you have a site you want me to add to the list, let me know. I'll be happy to check it out.

In Santa Fe, New Mexico some moron broke into a high school, doing $2,000 in damage, to steal 20 rifles used by the ROTC. Fortunately, they were dummy rifles and can not be used as weapons. Hopefully they will arrest this goober soon before he or she gets hurt.

All museums beware!! This klutz is on the loose and could be visiting you soon.
A visitor to a British museum tripped on his shoelace, stumbled down a stairway and fell into a display of centuries-old Chinese vases, shattering them into "very small pieces," officials said Monday.

The three Qing dynasty vases, dating from the late 17th or early 18th century, had been donated to the Fitzwilliam Museum in the university city of Cambridge in 1948 and were among its best-known artifacts.
The museum is planning to attempt repairs on the vases. The story doesn't say whether the "visitor" will be billed for the repairs, but he should be.

This story really maxes out the Ick Factor Scale.
Animal carcasses and parts dumped on the Riverview Expressway gave motorists a smelly rush-hour detour Monday and left authorities hunting for whoever dropped the material to the pavement.
Now we get the frequent dead possum or raccoon around here, but this goes way beyond that.
Police blocked a part of the expressway about 4 p.m. and required westbound traffic to use the left turn lane to avoid the mess, Wesener said.

The city street department brought in a front-end loader to clear away the carcasses and other animal parts and scrape the pavement clean.
What really gets me is the fact that police have to hunt for whoever did this. Are there really that many trucks running around up there full of dead critters?

Triticale is hosting this week's pot luck version of Carnival of Recipes. Go over and collect some great dishes for the Super Bowl. After all, who wants to cook when there's a football game on?

On my way home from the grocery store today, I was listening to Sean Hannity's radio program, and a 13-year-old girl called to tell him about her new website. Now he doesn't normally put websites on the air because of the fruitcake factor, but he made an exception in her case. Her site is called Operation Thunder Storm. This child is trying to arrange penpals for an entire regiment. If you can spare a few minutes every week, go on over and sign up to adopt a soldier. It will really boost their morale, and you'll feel good at the same time.

Monday, January 30, 2006

At a fundraiser on Thursday night, Janet Reno sang Aretha Franklin's "Respect" for the crowd. The event was to raise money for the Human Services Coalition, a group that fights poverty. No word yet on how many dogs howled during the performance. If you want to see the video, click on the link.

Well, this article definitely explains why students at Yale always have their noses stuck up in the air:
It took a decade of student lobbying, but Yale University appears ready to break with tradition and supply soap for dormitory bathrooms on one of the oldest campuses in America.
Now all we have to do is find someone to show them how to use it.

Here's a trio of blonde jokes to brighten the day of everyone who's not blonde:

Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking.......and one blonde says to the other: "Which do you think is farther away....... Florida or the moon?" The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ...?????


A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died. After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
She says, "What's the story?"
He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"


A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license. She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
Thanks for sending these to me, sis!

This story must be a joke. Cindy Sheehan is seriously thinking about running against Dianne Feinstein for Senator in California. Somebody please get her a watch; her 15 minutes were up a long time ago. Actually, I hope she does run. And I hope Ms. Feinstein kicks her butt all the way home. I've got little use for Feinstein's politics, but she's not nearly as looney as Sheehan. And when the butt-kicking starts, it should be televised on C-Span or something so people can see what happens to moonbats when they overstep their bounds.

I've heard some crazy campaign promises in my life, but this one is just over the top:
Premier Silvio Berlusconi has promised Italians he would lower taxes and raise pensions. His latest campaign pledge is rather personal: no sex until April 9 elections, an Italian newspaper reported Sunday.
What do you want to bet he votes really, really early on election day?

For those who care or possibly had bets on the results, here is a list of the winners of this year's Sag Awards.

Saturday, January 28, 2006

Here's a funny I got in my e-mail. I cleaned it up for those who don't appreciate profanity:

It was entertainment night at the senior center and the Amazing Claude was topping the bill. People came from miles around to see the famed hypnotist do his stuff. As Claude went to the front of the meeting room, he announced, "Unlike most hypnotists who invite two or three people up here to be put into a trance, I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience."

The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from his coat. "I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. It's been in my family for six generations."

He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting, "Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch...." The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface. Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch, until, suddenly, .... it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor, breaking into a hundred pieces.

"""Crap!"""" said Claude.....

It took three weeks to clean up the Senior Center.

You might want to check out this week's Carnival of Comedy, hosted by Radioactive Liberty. It will definitely bring a smile to your face.

Who says opera is a bad thing? Certainly not me. I enjoy it, but rarely hear it due to Sir Mugley's aversion to it. But it really is good. At least according to this story, which shows Merino sheep produce their finest wool when listening to opera music. So the next time you get a sweater made of extremely superfine wool, thank an opera singer.

The police in Thurston County, Washington can take it easy for a while. The prisoners are so good they catch themselves. Lance Gauthun tried to escape from the county jail, only to fall down an embankment he couldn't climb out of. He yelled for help, which landed him in the big boy's jail on an attempted escape charge. The really bad thing is he only had 10 days to go on his original sentence. Now he's gonna be there a lot longer.

Well, the other shoe is dropping here in Missouri. Our illustrious governor Matt Blunt is trying to push through a plan to force the disabled on oxygen to start paying for their own equipment service and supplies after they've been on oxygen for three years. This is outrageous! And I'm not just saying that because I'm an oxygen patient. The supplies for oxygen tanks are not individually really that expensive, however you have to replace tubing and cannulas frequently. Tubing must be replaced once a month, and cannulas at least once a week. For each tank. If the patient is on a concentrator, they require filters which need to be replaced frequently, and God help you if it breaks down. Plus you have to have backup oxygen tanks in case of a power failure, and portable tanks so you're not trapped in the house for the rest of your life. Then there is the cost of the machine itself. The rental fee for a concentrator is well over $300 a month. Not to mention the doubling of your electric bill because it runs 24/7.

If you're lucky (as I am) to be on liquid oxygen, you have two large tanks in your home, which need to be refilled every other week. Then you have two small tanks for travel, which can be filled off the large tanks. Under the governor's plan, all maintenance, and I'm assuming this includes the valves and internal workings on the tanks, must be paid by the disabled person who is probably living on a pathetic Social Security check.

This is just as stupid as the cutting off of 90,000 plus patients from the Medicaid rolls was last year. Many older people won't have the slightest idea how to go about fixing these machines. The oxygen companies take care of the maintenance now so the patients don't have to know how to do this crap. I sincerely hope the state legislature shoots this plan down. A lot of older Missourians are depending on it.

You Are Likely a Second Born

At your darkest moments, you feel inadequate.
At work and school. you do best when you're evaluating.
When you love someone, you offer them constructive criticism.

In friendship, you tend to give a lot of feedback - positive and negative.
Your ideal careers are: accounting, banking, art, carpentry, decorating, teaching, and writing novels.
You will leave your mark on the world with art and creative projects.
The Birth Order Predictor

Boy are they wrong this time! I'm number six on Mom's side, and number one on Dad's side. I don't think that adds up to a two. I'm lousy at art, and couldn't write my way out of a paper bag (this blog should prove that!) Other than that, it's okay!!

Thursday, January 26, 2006

I want to take a moment to wish a very Happy 64th Birthday to my wonderful brother, Jerry. Why, you ask, did I choose to display a turkey with this post? Glad you asked. When my children were mere babes, Jerry tried to teach them to call their grandmother a turkey. It backfired on him, and from then on to my kids he was Uncle Turkey. I remember one Christmas we got him a very large iced tea glass that said "Turkey" on it. I love you, bubby. Have a great day!

James Lileks teaches us how to make fools of ourselves on the Internet. Everyone should read this article and take the lessons to heart.

There must really be some gullible people in the Ozarks, I'm sorry to say.
Friday night, a man knocked on doors holding a tattoo gun and offering his services. Tamra Eason described the tool as homemade, but still agreed to pay for a tattoo. So did two other women in her apartment complex.

"It was wrapped with black tape, had a pin underneath it, had fishing wire going through it, you could tell it was a homemade gun," Eason said.

The next day, Linda Falls passed out and had to be hospitalized. "I passed out in the store and they said I should have it checked out," Falls said.

All the women have an infection in the tattoo area and have been told to get tested for HIV and hepatitis.
No comment.

Sometimes you're better off with the hiccups.
A Colombian man accidentally shot his nephew to death while trying to cure his hiccups by pointing a revolver at him to scare him, police in the Caribbean port city of Barranquilla said on Tuesday.

After shooting 21-year-old university student David Galvan in the neck, his uncle, Rafael Vargas, 35, was so distraught he turned the gun on himself and committed suicide, police said.
See what I mean? Hiccups aren't so bad.

Michael Jackson's parents must be so proud. After all, they gave life to a walking, talking joke. The latest: Michael was seen shopping at a mall in Bahrain, dressed in an abaya. An abaya is the long robe and veil normally worn by women. He had his children dressed pretty much the same way. I feel so sorry for those children.

Former Survivor contestant Richard Hatch was found guilty of tax evasion, and could conceivably go to jail for up to 13 years. He better keep his clothes on while he's there.

This father in Portland would have been better off to stick his foot in his mouth.
An Oregon man hurled both of his prosthetic legs at a state trooper, striking him with one, after his son was arrested on suspicion of drunken driving, police said on Monday.
You know, I'd almost be willing to bet daddy wasn't too sober, either.

Could a utility company be charged with manslaughter if someone died after looking at their bill? An interesting proposition, to be sure. Fortunately that didn't happen in this case, but it might have had it been me.
ZANESVILLE, Ohio - Lewis Miller joked with his son as he opened his gas bill that the amount likely would give him a heart attack. Then, he saw that The Energy Cooperative of Newark had billed him $8,095 for the first nine days of service on his new account for his apartment.
The energy company corrected his bill right away, but he's probably lost a few years of his life from the stress.

This is a pitiful story on two levels. First off, the story itself. A man burglarized a motel office, and left a note for the manager stating which room he was staying in. The note was a riot of incorrectly spelled words, proving his higher education.

The second level is the article. Although Yahoo ordinarily gets details right in these stories, in this case they were a few time zones off. Last time I checked, Fort Bragg was in North Carolina, not California. Bad Yahoo.

That travesty of a television show, The Book of Daniel has been cancelled by NBC. I, for one, am glad. There are a lot of shows on television that portray Christians in a bad light, but this one raised the mockery to a whole new level. Good riddance.

Sunday, January 22, 2006

That poor little whale I wrote about yesterday (I call him little Thame-y), has died. The little critter went into convulsions while rescuers were trying to transport it back out to sea. R.I.P. baby.

Here's a woman who will never be voted Mother of the Year:
A Westmont woman will spend 30 days in the DuPage County Jail beginning next month after she admitted leaving her three young children home alone for nine hours while she attended a taping of "The Jerry Springer Show" in Chicago.

Shannon Cook, 24, of the 300 block of South Cass Avenue, pleaded guilty earlier this week to three misdemeanor counts of endangering the life of a child because of no adult supervision, authorities said.

She was ordered to surrender to begin serving her jail sentence Feb. 10.

DuPage County Judge Daniel Guerin also placed Cook on one year of probation and ordered her to pay $525 in fees and fines.

DuPage court records show Cook has a son, 3 ½ years, a 2-year-old daughter and a daughter who is less than a year old.
It's bad enough she was that stupid, but the judge isn't much better. Those kids could have been killed, and the best he could do is 30 days in county jail?

As you ladies know, sometimes using a toilet can be a "chilling experience". But this man really got a raw deal.
When a 58-year-old motorist nipped into a German highway rest stop public toilet to answer the call of nature Friday morning, he had no idea how cruel nature could be.

Off highway A6 near the town of Lichtenau in Bavaria, which has been experiencing cold weather and snow over the past few days, the man found himself trapped in the toilet stall after the lock froze while he was inside.

Unable to pry the door open, the man finally was able to explain his predicament when someone occupied the stall next to him and get them to call police on a cell phone.

Here's a story, of a stupid robber... no, wait. That's not how the song goes. Anyway, there's a man in Massachusetts who is wishing he'd thought out his bank robbing plan a little better. If you're gonna fake having a bomb in a bag, make sure the bag filler does not include a phone book with your address on it. Just a tip to keep in mind if you have any asperations along those lines, which I hope you don't.

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Sir Mugley had the strangest experience the other day. We were reading the obits from Kansas City, where we grew up, and we found his name. No kidding! It was a little bit surreal, seeing my spouse's name in the obituary column. We knew already that there was another person with his name born in Missouri. The old driver's license numbers were 16 digits normally, but his had 17. They add an extra number if there are duplicate names. It freaked people out sometimes, because they thought his license number was fake. Anyway, that's my story of my husband's "brush with death". Hopefully, that's as close as we'll get for a long, long time.

The people of London got a thrill today when a whale swam up the Thames. Several people made attempts to divert the whale to a course that would take it back out to sea. We'll see if they were successful.

You often hear of rocks and debris falling off overpasses onto cars, injuring the passengers or drivers. You rarely hear of full-grown dogs falling onto cars. That's exactly what happened in Michigan this week. A man was walking his labrador when the dog dodged an oncoming vehicle, and fell off the overpass. The dog landed on a car, smashing the windshield and killing the driver. The dog also died.

A woman in England received two miracles at once. According to this story, the woman, who had been blind since 1979, awoke in the hospital after surviving a heart attack, and found she could see again. If this story is true, she's really got a lot to be thankful for.

A 60 year old woman in Kansas City, Kansas really put her best foot forward when it came to protecting herself. Two armed men tried to rob her in her own garage, and she successfully chased them off after hitting one in the face with her shoe. Too bad it wasn't an Army boot.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

There's cautious optimism in Massachusetts tonight. A girl whose stepfather tried to knock her brains out of her head was deemed in a vegetative state, and the state Supreme Court authorized the removal of her ventilator and feeding tube. Now she's breathing on her own and is starting to respond to medical stimuli. Naturally, it is too soon to know how much damage this monster has done to this child, but it's starting to look good, considering they expected her to be dead by now.

The next time you're stuck in rush-hour traffic, and you think it couldn't get any worse, remember this article:
About 2,000 pounds of treated human waste with the consistency of fresh cow manure spilled into freeway when the driver of a southbound tractor-trailer rig braked suddenly to avoid a stopped vehicle about 25 miles north of Seattle, Washington State Patrol investigators said.

The trailer had only a cloth top, and much of the waste sloshed over the truck cab and across a wide section of the road, patrol Sgt. Craig H. Johnson told The Herald of Everett.
Yuck! I guess it could have been worse, though. There weren't any convertibles in the area at the time.

Some people will go to amazing lengths to get out of their responsibilities. Johnny Martin faked his death 25 years ago, just to get out of paying child support. He got caught.

I guess there really is an exception to just about every rule. At least at the Tokyo Zoo. There you can find roommates Gohan and Aochan living very contentedly. One is a hamster, the other is a rat snake. I know, it is very strange.

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

A joke I received via e-mail:

A young lady goes sto her local pet store in search of an exotic pet. As she looks about the store, she notices a box full of live frogs. The sign says: "Sex Frogs! Only $20 each! Money Back Guarantee! Comes with complete instructions."

The girl excitedly looks around to see if anybody's watching her and whispers softly to the man behind the counter, "I'll take one."

The man packages the frog and says, "Just follow the instructions." The girl nods, grabs the box, and is quickly on her way home.

As soon as she closes the door to her apartment, she reads the instructions and reads them very carefully. She does exactly what is specified:

1. Take a shower.
2. Splash on some nice perfume.
3. Slip into a very sexy nightie.
4. Crawl into bed and place the frog down beside you and allow the frog to follow its training.

She then quickly gets into bed with the frog and, to her surprise, nothing happens! The girl is very disappointed and quite upset at this point. She re-reads the instructions and notices at the bottom of the paper it says, "If you have any problems or questions, please call the pet store."

So, the lady calls the pet store. The man says, "I'll be right over."

Within minutes, the man is ringing her doorbell. The lady welcomes him in and says, "See, I've done everything according to the instructions and the darn thing just sits there."

The man, looking very concerned, picks up the frog, stares directly into its eyes and sternly says, "Listen to me! I'm only going to show you how to do this one more time!"

Mayor Nagin has apologized for his "inappropriate" remarks made Monday. As predicted, no one is calling his remarks regarding a "chocolate" New Orleans racist. I surrender; I guess some factions just don't want discrimination to end. I'll never understand that. If someone could explain why everyone shouldn't be treated equally on every playing field, I would appreciate that. I may be wrong, but I think that things said or done should be color-free. I mean, if a sentence or act couldn't be done by someone of any race, it shouldn't be done. I guess I'm just a freak of nature.

There is a very happy man in California tonight. Alan Poster is the proud owner of a 1968 Corvette in very good condition. What makes this an unusual situation is that the car was stolen from him in New York in 1968, 3 months after he purchased it. His dream car was gone. Then, just moments before it was to be shipped overseas last November, it was discovered that the car had been stolen. After a long, grueling search, the New York police tracked him down. He plans to keep the car. After all, it was his dream.

It's amazing what you can do if you're a celebrity, isn't it? William Shatner recently sold his kidney stone for a mere $25,000 to GoldenPalace.com and donated the money to Habitat for Humanity. I wonder if they'd be interested in a much larger gallstone, which I would gladly sell them for half as much money. It's really kinda pretty.

Tuesday, January 17, 2006

I swear if Ray Nagin, mayor of New Orleans, wasn't a black man, he would be ostracized by society at every level. He says the most outrageous things, and continually gets away with it. His latest proclamation:
"It's time for us to come together. It's time for us to rebuild New Orleans _ the one that should be a chocolate New Orleans," the mayor said. "This city will be a majority African American city. It's the way God wants it to be. You can't have New Orleans no other way. It wouldn't be New Orleans."
Now why is that not considered a racist comment? Why aren't black leaders condemning such a stupid thing to say? I guess I'll never understand that.

Kaylee Reynolds is the most well-known person in New Bedford, Massachusetts today. Kaylee was called for jury duty, but she has no plans to honor the summons. You see, Kaylee is only two years old, and couldn't even read the summons.

ACC rivals Duke and North Carolina wanted to raise money for Hoop Dreams Basketball Academy, and in the process break the current Guinness record for longest game played. They did it: They just finished a 58 hour marathon basketball game, which was won by Duke. The final score was Duke 3,688 to North Carolina's 3,444. Get some rest, guys; you probably have some classes to attend tomorrow.

Congratulations to all the winners of the People's Choice and Golden Globes awards, especially Hugh Laurie of "House", who is a dreamy guy in my opinion. Hey, I may be getting older, but I'm not dead yet!

Saturday, January 14, 2006

I know I've been lagging in my posting the past week or two, but I'll be back soon. I'm helping Sir Mugley with his crime research, and it's taking up a lot of internet time. So keep reading the blogroll, and I'll be back very soon. Don't forget me, okay?

You Should Drive a Bentley Azure

You're all flash, and you love to show off to anyone who will watch.
And you're such a high roller, this is just one car of many for you...
What 2007 Car Should You Drive?

Tuesday, January 10, 2006

A 38 year old father was playing hide and seek with his children, and somehow managed to get stuck in a washing machine. Don't ya know he felt stupid when the firemen rescued him.

You don't want to mess with mice in New Mexico. They can get really nasty when they get revenge. A man tried to kill a mouse by throwing it on a burning pile of leaves, but the mouse had other ideas. It escaped the pile and re-entered the man's home, burning it to the ground.

A jury in New Jersey was examining the evidence in a case of attempted murder, when they found a clue in a torn-up coat the police had overlooked: 30 bags of crack. I wonder how that will affect the case.

A jury in New Jersey was examining the evidence in a case of attempted murder, when they found a clue the police had overlooked: 30 bags of crack. I wonder how that will affect the case.

One of our state senators, Bill Alter, has proposed some interesting legislation. The law would prohibit the sale of cold beer. The theory being that people would be less likely to pop the top on a warm can of beer on their way home from the store. I think he might be on to something there. The great thing is he got the idea from a fifth-grader. See, not all kids are self-centered.

Monday, January 09, 2006

An assistant football coach in Roswell, Georgia has resigned after it was learned that 17 of the team players were branded with heated paper clips. I don't know what to say here; that was wrong on so many levels. The real kicker is there's no mention in the story about a criminal investigation or charges being filed. I'm sorry, but I don't think losing his job is nearly enough punishment.

Another corporation steps up for our military members. Anheuser-Busch is offering free admittance to their theme parks for all active-duty servicemembers and families of military personnel serving overseas throughout 2006. That's great in my opinion. More companies should show their gratitude for the sacrifices being made.

Saturday, January 07, 2006

Okay, that's it for me for tonight. I promised my granddaughter I'd look up some internet stuff for her, since her mom won't go online. She has to do a report on Jesse James, and didn't have time to access the net at school. I guess we're gonna have to break down and get them online in spite of their mom, or they're gonna be left behind at school. I can't have that, just because their mommy can't control herself and stay off the computer. Anymore the children need that access just to keep up. See ya tomorrow.

Okay we're up to four affiliates who are refusing to air "The Book of Daniel" Friday night. I don't blame them; when you get a lot of negative emails you have to pay attention. I don't plan to watch it. I resent the way they are portraying Jesus and the average churchgoers. None of the previews showed a decent Christian.

Friday, January 06, 2006

And here's another moron, who stole some very valuable earrings, then took them to a jeweler for appraisal. Little did he know the jeweler he visited was the very same jeweler who had donated the earrings for the college fundraiser from which they were stolen. Makes you wonder how much crime would be solved if the criminals were intelligent.

C'mon, people! If you're gonna break the law, you don't do it in a car with vanity license plates! A moron in Nebraska decided to rob a bank, driving a getaway car with the license plate "FIND ME". The police did.

Some people will go to unbelievable lengths to pull a prank. In Colorado, someone went to a lot of trouble to insert a condom in a fillbert nutshell. I'm not sure what point they were trying to make, but I applaud their ingenuity.

Thursday, January 05, 2006

Talk about your stupid lawsuits. A man sued his town council because they closed a public toilet. Why should he sue for that, you ask? Because he didn't have sense enough to use the bathroom before he left home and wound up crapping in his pants, that's why. This is one of several examples of frivolous lawsuits filed recently.

I'm appalled, as I'm sure you are, over the happenings in West Virginia with the miners' families. I don't know how they could stand being on such a high thinking their loved ones were going to be fine, then finding out they were never going to be fine again. How such a dreadful mistake could be made I'll never understand. My heart goes out to them, especially the children, who went to bed not knowing their daddy would never come home again. Let's keep them in our prayers. They are definitely going to need them.

They must grow a special brand of stupid criminal in Sweden. This fool not only used a taxi as a getaway car after a burglary, but he answered the phone he had stolen and didn't hang up, allowing police to eavesdrop on his getaway.

This week the Carnival of Recipes is hosted at Caterwauling. These recipes look absolutely delicious.

Sunday, January 01, 2006


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