Saturday, November 08, 2008
Finally heard back from the prodigal daughter. The grandchild count will be remaining at 10. My sympathies go out to her and to Mark. It can be a really difficult time to go through.
Our family reunion is set for December 6 this year. Of course my brother has to work that afternoon so we'll have to do it early. My silly sister sent me an email to let me know she couldn't afford to purchase gifts this year, because she's been out of work since July. I told her that gifts were not the reason I showed up at these things and that's the truth. I seldom have money to buy gifts for my family. We generally scrape together enough to give each of the grandchildren a gift card. They really like getting them; they think it makes them more grown up if they can buy things themselves. Of course, this makes me the cool grandma! I can live with that.
I do worry about the oldest grandchild. She is currently living with her biological father, because he lied his butt off in court while my daughter was in the middle of getting a divorce, and got the ex to back him up, which he now regrets. This lovely girl, age 12, has a lanky, tomboy figure, small boned, and always happy. When I saw her in September, this child was quiet, rarely smiled and had bloomed up to about 150 pounds. She lives in a trailer with her father and his fiancee and their three year old son. They have no phone. She has no computer. He is very controlling. And he has started restricting the amount of time she can talk to her mother on the phone, and has been bailing on visitation rights. There's always a new excuse. I'm afraid she's going to have to go back to court and try and get her back before he does too much damage. I know the other three children are doing fine, but I've only seen her once since last December and it has been difficult. I know it's wrong, but there is a special bond with the first grandchild, and in my case it was increased because I was the labor coach and watched the birth. If you were to take a picture of my daughter and my granddaughter in pajamas in their cribs and lay them down beside one of me the same age, you couldn't tell them apart. It was like having her little all over again.
Pray for them please. Daughter and fiancee are coming Thanksgiving weekend for a visit. Hopefully son and daughter-in-law can come as well. We'll find a way to rent them a room or something and have a blast.
Our family reunion is set for December 6 this year. Of course my brother has to work that afternoon so we'll have to do it early. My silly sister sent me an email to let me know she couldn't afford to purchase gifts this year, because she's been out of work since July. I told her that gifts were not the reason I showed up at these things and that's the truth. I seldom have money to buy gifts for my family. We generally scrape together enough to give each of the grandchildren a gift card. They really like getting them; they think it makes them more grown up if they can buy things themselves. Of course, this makes me the cool grandma! I can live with that.
I do worry about the oldest grandchild. She is currently living with her biological father, because he lied his butt off in court while my daughter was in the middle of getting a divorce, and got the ex to back him up, which he now regrets. This lovely girl, age 12, has a lanky, tomboy figure, small boned, and always happy. When I saw her in September, this child was quiet, rarely smiled and had bloomed up to about 150 pounds. She lives in a trailer with her father and his fiancee and their three year old son. They have no phone. She has no computer. He is very controlling. And he has started restricting the amount of time she can talk to her mother on the phone, and has been bailing on visitation rights. There's always a new excuse. I'm afraid she's going to have to go back to court and try and get her back before he does too much damage. I know the other three children are doing fine, but I've only seen her once since last December and it has been difficult. I know it's wrong, but there is a special bond with the first grandchild, and in my case it was increased because I was the labor coach and watched the birth. If you were to take a picture of my daughter and my granddaughter in pajamas in their cribs and lay them down beside one of me the same age, you couldn't tell them apart. It was like having her little all over again.
Pray for them please. Daughter and fiancee are coming Thanksgiving weekend for a visit. Hopefully son and daughter-in-law can come as well. We'll find a way to rent them a room or something and have a blast.
Comments:
Hi Denise - life is different from what we remember growing up, isn't it. I understand how you feel about your grandchildren. I have two that I can't see - their mothers have thrown fits and won't let them be apart of our family. Nothing is ever simple. Values have changed and there's no commitments.
Good luck with your family get together I hope it all works out. Right on with the idea of gift cards to the Grands - great idea, and you are right, they love to spend their money their way.
Take care and God bless.
Jean
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Good luck with your family get together I hope it all works out. Right on with the idea of gift cards to the Grands - great idea, and you are right, they love to spend their money their way.
Take care and God bless.
Jean