Grandma's House

MEN ARE LIKE:

Laxatives... They irritate the crap out of you.
Bananas... The older they get, the less firm they are.
The Weather... Nothing can be done to change them.
Blenders... You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
Chocolate Bars... Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.
Commercials... You can't believe a word they say.
Department Stores... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
Government Bonds... They take soooooooo long to mature.
Mascara... They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
Popcorn... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
Snowstorms... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
Lava Lamps... Fun to look at, but not very bright.
Parking Spots... All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.