Grandma's House

I'll start you off with some jokes my loving sisters sent me while I was "off the air":

Olaf and Sven were fishing one day when Sven pulled out a cigar. Finding he had no matches, he asked Olaf for a light.

"Ya, sure, I tink I haff a lighter," he replied. Then, reaching into his tackle box, he pulled out a Bic lighter 10 inches long.

"Yiminy Cricket!" exclaimed Sven, taking the huge Bic lighter in his hands. "Vhere did yew git dat monster??"

"Vell," replied Olaf, "I got it from me Genie."

"You haff a genie in yor tackle box?" Sven asked.

"Ya, shure . It's right here in me tackle box," says Olaf.

"Could I see him?"

So Olaf opens his tackle box and sure enough, out pops the genie. Addressing the genie, Sven says, "Hey dere! I'm a good friend of your master. Vill you grant me vun vish?"

"Yes, I will," says the genie.

So Sven asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie disappears back into the tackle box leaving Sven sitting there, waiting for his million bucks.

Shortly, the sky darkens and is filled with the sound of a million ducks...flying overhead. Over the roar of the million ducks Sven yells at Olaf. "Yumpin' Yimmny I asked for a million bucks, not a million ducks!"

Olaf answers, "Ya, I forgot to tell yew dat da genie is hard of hearing. Do yew really tink I asked for a 10-inch Bic?"